Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Seriously what is that? and,... you are gonna eat that?

So I am currently on the street covering for an officer while he takes some time off. That's right I am rocking the night shifts. I love them.... its when the crazies come out... and not just the crazy people we end up dealing with......I mean some of the fellow cops in my area. I forgot what Night shifts can do to your psychological fitness.

Take for instance the County Deputy who shall remain nameless for now. No. I will name him. We will name him Deputy Jailskettie. Yes. I know his name is a Siamese twin combination of Jail and spaghetti with the white trash pronunciation of spaghetti with a "K"... not a "G" and dropping the "H".

Deputy Jailsketti and I had just returned from a riveting call that involved trucks and smaller cars and unlawful entries and peace being disturbed, you know the usual. while sitting in the patrol room, Deputy Jailsketti informed me that he was going to get something from the jail kitchen to eat and asked if I wanted to come. Sure, I thought how bad could jail food be. I figured I would pick out a little personal pizza or maybe one of those sweet artificial bean and cheese burritos I see the inmates munching away on all the time.

well as luck would have it, I happened to be allergic to all of those things, and could not partake. Deputy Jailsketti had his eye on a bread loaf pan full of what I thought was fish bait,or autopsy souvenirs. He told me that it was spaghetti. What ever. It wasn't packaged and that means it was made by the inmate workers........ no thanks.

So he heated it up. Ate it,.......... and before I knew it he turned into a a brain eating zombie munching away on one of the dispatchers shoulder sections... wait I think that may have been a hallucination brought on by sleep deprivation.

Well I won't eat the jail food and that meant I was going to have to get something from the only place open at 2:00 a.m. Maverick. I chose a large burrito monstrosity called "the bomb".

We will see how that choice turns out tomorrow.

Best part of night shifts?..........fun calls.

Worst part?................................nutritional options.